My buddy Ed Dale made a dramatic and controversial decision to “unfriend” all his Facebook friends and start over. Watch this video I made to get all the details, and let me know your opinion.
Read Ed’s post at: http://tubbynerd.com/2009/02/10/its-not-you-its-me-my-goodbye-to-facebook-friends/


















February 21st, 2009 at 2:32 pm
Hello Ryan,
I think ed and you might be missing the critical point.
If you want to create a group of like minded people, you can do just that. Create a group. I have one for Colombians living outside the country and by god i do not know any of them. We just share a commonality. we all live outside our own country.
Create a group or groups that represents you, your product, your vision or whatever you want to then have unlimited people that can join the group, and you have the ability to contact them all at will.
It’s also easier to market later to them since they all know they are there with one an only objective to be part of the group and get news or help with stuff related to the group.
People can leave a group just like unsubscribing from an email….no big deal. NOT FRIENDS REALLY, just like minded people.
So essentially, you can build a list of targeted people, and have the means to contact them, market them or promote other solutions, services and products related.
The people in my group leave it or join it at will.
This solves all the challenges, you guys are talking about and you can leave the social side of facebook to your real friends and family.
Groups are for business, social can be for friends, although i must accept i SIN a lot and mix them both.
I just don’t have 5,000 or 2,000 friends i just broke the 1,000 mark.I have also done the same thing and accepted every friend request there is, and you and ed may be right about that and there is techniques that can remedy the whole thing like filters etc. that allows facebook to be BOTH a viable marketing solution and a friends page.
I hope you get to read this Ryan, I was happy to buy your continuity blueprint. Keep up the good job.
I am looking forward to chat with you about business.
I’m the only spanish public speaker with a real training in real estate based on my very unbeliabable story.
check it out.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MAhH67mkVSU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9VlIJfFXQYA
When possible drop me a line so we can do something in spanish. I already have all materials trainings etc.
I know you know how strong the spanish market is becoming and nobody is targeting it.
Thanks Ryan.
Continue giving great content. You Rock Man
Adios
Luis Duque
February 21st, 2009 at 4:12 pm
I think it all depends on if facebook is a part of your business model or if it is a personal outlet.
February 21st, 2009 at 4:34 pm
Welll … I even before I’d read Ed’s post the other day, I’d kinda come to the same conclusion.
See I’ve had a rash of HS friends suddenly popping up and even more importantly, a young cousin of mine sent me a friend request … what am I gonna tell her - no?
Time to have a social life online and NOT be always focused on business methinks. Besides, I’m enjoying Mafia Wars and somehow, that just doesn’t seem to mix in with the wellness and NWM crowd so well - lol.
I want a place to let my hair down. Facebook is it.
Thanks for the video Ryan
Andrea
February 21st, 2009 at 4:40 pm
I would not delete your friends from Facebook, why waist such valuable resources, instead just open a new account through a new email, like a yahoo email JUST for your personal life, that is what I do.
I have several facebooks and Myspace profiles each one with a different purpose and hardly do they ever meet or cross paths.
February 22nd, 2009 at 1:41 pm
Repetition works need I say more, other than DO IT! (excuse the shouting)
February 22nd, 2009 at 2:03 pm
Ryan,
I agree with the idea of having a fan page and/or group page, yet having a networking facebook account is important as well. I have two facebook accounts just like the post above, one that is personal where I can play stupid games with my friends, talk personal stuff, and is private. The other is my business page where I network with other speakers, fans, gurus, etc etc and we share links, ideas, etc etc.
It’s not a bad thing to have multiple faces on facebook, heck I have even had some of my old high school friends “friend” both of my accounts and eventually converted them into clients.
Just my $.02
Dan
February 22nd, 2009 at 7:45 pm
Actually Ryan, I’ve had two FB accounts for a while now. One for personal and one for business. I get people who find my personal account and want to be friends on that account so I just ignore the request from my personal account and then request them to be a friend on my business account. It works out great.
February 23rd, 2009 at 12:12 am
I unfriended my non-friends months ago. What’s the big deal? I do like the group suggestion in the comment above. I use groups for segments of my friends like classmates and former co-workers and we have fun communicating that way. A group along product lines would be a nice way to stay warm with your customers. I see that Ed has been making a big deal about this for a few weeks now so he must have an angle or be up to something.
February 26th, 2009 at 2:04 am
I can definitely relate also, but I wouldn’t go and throw the baby out with the bathwater. It’s true that the definition of “friend” is being blurred little here, but it’s still a great way to always have a connection around when you need one…for instance, you need a webdesigner or copywriter, just like going to elance, you can just put in your status that you need a certain something done for you and you’re looking for someone to help.
What would be ideal, as far as how you said you miss out on important things from your real close friends, would be for Facebook to allow you to attach priority levels to friends, so maybe on a 1-5 scale you could designate your friend from high school or college a 5, and someone who saw you speak on a stage somewhere or heard you on a conference call you could make a 1. Then when those people have something on the news feed, the 4’s and 5’s would stay up at the top of the list longer than the 1’s or 2’s, or something like that.
Now if Facebook comes up with this idea themselves, could you all make sure they give me a royalty for that idea?!
February 28th, 2009 at 8:28 pm
It is a personal decision for Ed or anyone else to make, as to how they are going to utilize social networking. Who are we to say otherwise?
March 4th, 2009 at 1:24 am
Hiya:
Well, I read Ed Dale article before I bumped into your site here. And I responded to him on that page to let him know that I was not in support 100%.
Also, that I was torn with his decision and the reasons why. I have deliberately been slow in adding ‘friends’ to my face book because I was pretty much clueless about social media.
Thought it was really stupid for people to be collecting friends that they will never talk to only to boast to others that they have 5,000 friends on Facebook and myspace. Dumb. Dumb. Dumb.
Also, I think I found it stupid because I’m one who is SooOOOOO okay with having a few friends such as pistachio icecream, lots of money, family, and my boxer dog. So, I couldn’t relate to the whole facebook/myspace craze.
I recently learned that I was ‘unfriended’ by someone whose product that I invested in, had a few emails with, and etc..And you know what? It pissed me off! To say the least.
How awkward will it now be when I run into this person at a conference? So, I’m torn and may possibly be more understanding of Ed’s decision to delete and start over. I still didn’t think his article was great - c’mon, that was a stretch to say. Controversial, but not great.
I may start over as well and simply have just family as facebook friends (and of course, my boxer!) because I remember deleting a ‘friend’ because she was so annoying with her MLM rants every news feel. *rolling eyes*
It was so bad that I was welcoming aggressive marketers (like you, Ryan…lol!) just no more MLM rah, rah, rah cheers. Puh-Leeze, shoot me somebody.
Oh, another thing…..most people don’t care to be contacted by old high school friends, ex-boyfriends, ex-co workers, past neighbors, and the like. geeesh. How friggin annoying that was!! I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me. NOT. That’s the last thing I wanted to engage in. Pictures of ex-boyfriends and new wives & baby. Riiiight. Yik. The past is in the PAST for a darn good reason, most of the time.
Hey, most people don’t know what they’re doing on face book when it comes to marketing anyway, so, folks like you, Ryan, and the other aggressive holding ‘jealously guarded underground secrets’ will make a killing keeping the floodgates open because you will find aLOT of people there who will throw their wallets at your products and just keep
going around in circles for eternity.
They are (the masses, except for me & you, of course!)like dumb sheep without any real focus coupled with
lazy spirits, & get rick quick mentalities that are soOOO perfect for what sMart marketers (old boys network) have to sell.
Okay, off the soap box. For now, that is.
Cheerios,
Yves Marie Danie
March 4th, 2009 at 1:35 am
Good gracious…. I can’t write. I meant to say:
Hey, most people don’t know what they’re doing on face book when it comes to marketing anyway, so, folks like you, Ryan, and the other aggressive holding ‘jealously guarded underground secrets’ MARKETERS will make a killing keeping the floodgates open. Why?
Because you will find a LOT of people there who will throw their wallets at your products and just keep going around in circles for eternity. Umm, kind of like MLM, errrr. Yea, BRILLIANT model.
For marketing dum-dum’s (like I used to be, duh!)? No, MLM is a BRILLIANT model for people who are WICKED at direct response marketing, copywriting, psychological triggers, online marketing, and any kind of NLP mumbo jumbo that Tony Robbins teaches.
But, um, the little guy in MLM makes just enough to keep the well-oiled machine running while the smart guys (who REALLY know how the dang thing works) racks in the money. Oh, and while the the leader guy/gal keeps the sheep ‘motivated’ a.k.a brainwashed to keep auto-renewal.
You may not publish my post because it’s probably not rosey, but I think you should. Frankly, I don’t care how people take me online (and offline, haaa!). I’m raw. Real. & could really give a damn if I have 5,000 friends on facebook, myspace, or any other those other potentially time wasting online platforms that people hopelessly and pathetically search for love on.
Ouch. I know. I felt that one. Hey, truth hurts.
Publish my post and let the war begin. Bring it, baby.
April 23rd, 2009 at 4:10 am
Could you recommend any specific resources, books, or other blogs on this specific NLP topic?
September 3rd, 2009 at 7:05 am
Great post. Nice blog design also, troubling to see your RSS feed though :S